I am disappointed in myself for not keeping up with this blog on a regular basis like I used to, and find myself coming back here at the mercy of bad news.

The last three days were a whirlwind for me. I can still feel my head spinning and I am not exactly sure when it is going to stop spinning. If I break it down for you all maybe it will also give me a better understanding as why this all happened at the same time and smacked me in the face.

Friday (night) October 2nd
As I wasted a small portion of my life of facebook, I found out that a photographer/friend of mine, John Barton, was sick in the hospital. Him and I exchanged FB messages after I asked him what was wrong. He replied and told me he was admitted to the hospital for a severe foot infection. It turned into an abscess and his doctor ended up having to drain it, releasing 30cc's of puss out of his foot and put him on heavy duty IV antibiotics. They were trying to avoid amputating his foot. At the end of his FB message he "thanked me for caring."

Saturday October 3rd
Saturday morning, I had to work in the ER. Jan, our weekend nursing supervisor and the mother of my friend, Kerri (who is dating another friend of mine,his name is Keith, who joined the Army and is deployed in Afghanistan right now).
Anyways.. Jan was doing her rounds throughout the hospital and made her way down to the ER. She began to tell me of a dillema that kerri was in. Keith has R&R this month. However, right smack in the middle of his RR Kerri had already arranged a plane ticket for an out of state reunion, which is very important to her. Keith didn't want her to go, naturally. She really wants to see all these people because after the reunion they will all be scattered around the US. And she's having trouble trying to figure out what she should do. Having been through it all before, my response was easy. I told her that in my opinion, Kerri should cancel her trip to the reunion. That she should spend every waking moment with Keith because she doesn't know if it'll be the last time she will ever see him. After Keith's R&R she can book flights around the U.S. to see her friends. She will NEVER be able to book a flight to Afghanistan. It's a matter of who and what is most important to her.

Sunday October 4th
Again, I was at work again in the ER. I went on my lunch break and then outside for a smoke. When I came back in and hung up my sweatshirt in the breakroom the charge nurse was in there on her break. She told me that Jan was looking for me. I went out to the department and the other tech, also, told me Jan was looking for me. I went to Bryan, the secretary and he told me to page her. I waited about five minutes with no call back. So I asked Bryan if he knew what it was about. He said, "yes." When I asked him WHAT it was about, he said "It's not my position to tell you. Page her again." That's when I felt like someone kicked me in right in the gut. I tried to convince myself that it was in regards to our laceration trays. I paged Jan again. When she finally called back, I could hear it in her voice as she started to tell me that she had just spoken with Kerri. Keith's base in Afghanistan was ambushed Saturday morning, eight U.S. soldiers had been reported dead already. One of them being Keith's bestfriend.
Later on in the evening, after I had got home from work, I was back on facebook. That's when I noticed all the posts on John Barton's page saying "Rest in Peace." He died Saturday morning. Not even 24 hours after I had talked to him. I am in one big, giant state of shock right now. And I know that only time will help heal this heavy heart that I must drag along with me as I place one foot in front of the other... taking one step at a time.