Today I am not all that tired. This comes as a surprise to me... since I barely got any sleep last night. I don't even think it's possible to call what I got last night, sleep. I pretty much tossed and turned while resting my eyes for a good 8 hours. My stomach was in knots all night long. I had a bad feeling about something. Someone is bound to spring some bad news on me before the week is over. If I end up being wrong... I'll be pleasantly satisfied. No more bad news. I've had more than my fair share of that this year. Now that things are finally starting to go right in my life (with the exception of my soldier having to go to Iraq for a year), I'm not quite sure how I'd react to any bad news.
I guess you could say I did catch a little bit of bad news from my friend Gary, who is home from the Marines on a medical leave. He informed me the other day, that if he was still in Iraq.. I'd be attending another funeral. The vehicle that he was assigned to ride in while over at the Sandbox... it got blown up, and everyone in it has passed away. My heart aches for their families... but I cannot lie.. I had that sigh of relief. The one where you mentally thank God that this bad news does not personally affect you, or your hectic life. How selfish it is to think that way. I know. And I will be the first to admit it. But in all honesty.. is there any individual out there who would want to be affected by such a tragedy?! I've been down that road before.. remember?.. 2 military funerals in 1 month. It is beyond difficult... searching for comforting words to say to the families of fallen heros.. it's like losing your wedding band while swimming in the ocean and then trying to look for it. Are you ever going to find it?? Highly unlikey. Is it even worth it? Sure it is.. ultimately for the sake of love and respect.
Wow.. listen to me. Rambling on and on, while I'm sure not many people care what I have to say. But please just humor me, as I am trying to pass the time. I cannot remember the last time I was up so early. Usually I don't wake up until about noon time... or whenever it is that the benadryl decides is time for me to rise up out of the coma it knocked me into the night before. I am running real low on the liquid stuff. I have jumped from taking 4 teaspoons up to 4 tablespoons. I acknowledge the fact that 4 tablespoons is just a tad bit too much.. but I sleep like a baby, that's for damn sure. Last night I had to resort to benadryl pills due to the lack of liquid benadryl that remains. In the past I have been fine taking one 25mg tablet, but I figured with the amount I've been taking of the other stuff that I'd be better off increasing the dose. Anxious for a good night's sleep, 50mg obviously wasn't enough with all the tossing and turning I did. I was afraid of over doing it and taking too big of a dose. Why?.. I have no freaking idea! 4 tablespoons of liquid benadryl and I was afraid 50 measly mg might be overdoing it! I'm not quite sure what is wrong with me.. I should know this stuff, especially working in the medical field! Oy vey! I can tell already that today is going to be far too long for me.
I am patiently waiting for Tony to call me. I have spoken with him already today, via phone, but he had to end the call so he could go to chow. Fine by me. He definately needs something to eat this AM after yesterday. The poor thing trained all day long yesterday in the rain, and was still hungry even after evening chow, but he knew if he ate something so late at night that he'd never get any sleep. So as he was headed for bed he found out he had CQ from 0200-0400. His team leader was kind enough to not tell him. Not only did that get Tony angry... I was pretty pissed off as well. He's gotten pretty much 2 hours of sleep total.. and now he has an entire day ahead of him. An entire day of biting his tongue and having a bit of self-control so that he does not snap on his marvelous, knowledgeable team leader. He's miserable... and that saddens me. I hurt so much knowing that I cannot hold him in my arms... knowing that I cannot kiss away his every frustration, letdown, and fear. I can't help but count the days down until he is able to come home and marry me! 16 days and a wake up left. This is taking forever. I wish so much that patience was not a virtue!
Enough for now.. my soldier hubby is on the phone! So I am going to talk to him!!
I guess you could say I did catch a little bit of bad news from my friend Gary, who is home from the Marines on a medical leave. He informed me the other day, that if he was still in Iraq.. I'd be attending another funeral. The vehicle that he was assigned to ride in while over at the Sandbox... it got blown up, and everyone in it has passed away. My heart aches for their families... but I cannot lie.. I had that sigh of relief. The one where you mentally thank God that this bad news does not personally affect you, or your hectic life. How selfish it is to think that way. I know. And I will be the first to admit it. But in all honesty.. is there any individual out there who would want to be affected by such a tragedy?! I've been down that road before.. remember?.. 2 military funerals in 1 month. It is beyond difficult... searching for comforting words to say to the families of fallen heros.. it's like losing your wedding band while swimming in the ocean and then trying to look for it. Are you ever going to find it?? Highly unlikey. Is it even worth it? Sure it is.. ultimately for the sake of love and respect.
Wow.. listen to me. Rambling on and on, while I'm sure not many people care what I have to say. But please just humor me, as I am trying to pass the time. I cannot remember the last time I was up so early. Usually I don't wake up until about noon time... or whenever it is that the benadryl decides is time for me to rise up out of the coma it knocked me into the night before. I am running real low on the liquid stuff. I have jumped from taking 4 teaspoons up to 4 tablespoons. I acknowledge the fact that 4 tablespoons is just a tad bit too much.. but I sleep like a baby, that's for damn sure. Last night I had to resort to benadryl pills due to the lack of liquid benadryl that remains. In the past I have been fine taking one 25mg tablet, but I figured with the amount I've been taking of the other stuff that I'd be better off increasing the dose. Anxious for a good night's sleep, 50mg obviously wasn't enough with all the tossing and turning I did. I was afraid of over doing it and taking too big of a dose. Why?.. I have no freaking idea! 4 tablespoons of liquid benadryl and I was afraid 50 measly mg might be overdoing it! I'm not quite sure what is wrong with me.. I should know this stuff, especially working in the medical field! Oy vey! I can tell already that today is going to be far too long for me.
I am patiently waiting for Tony to call me. I have spoken with him already today, via phone, but he had to end the call so he could go to chow. Fine by me. He definately needs something to eat this AM after yesterday. The poor thing trained all day long yesterday in the rain, and was still hungry even after evening chow, but he knew if he ate something so late at night that he'd never get any sleep. So as he was headed for bed he found out he had CQ from 0200-0400. His team leader was kind enough to not tell him. Not only did that get Tony angry... I was pretty pissed off as well. He's gotten pretty much 2 hours of sleep total.. and now he has an entire day ahead of him. An entire day of biting his tongue and having a bit of self-control so that he does not snap on his marvelous, knowledgeable team leader. He's miserable... and that saddens me. I hurt so much knowing that I cannot hold him in my arms... knowing that I cannot kiss away his every frustration, letdown, and fear. I can't help but count the days down until he is able to come home and marry me! 16 days and a wake up left. This is taking forever. I wish so much that patience was not a virtue!
Enough for now.. my soldier hubby is on the phone! So I am going to talk to him!!
posted by Stacie @ 8:24 AM
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